Emotion Coaching

Friday's parent meeting was a huge success!

Thank you to all the parents who came out to learn about parenting styles and emotion coaching, a style we use at Peregrine to teach kids about their emotions. Parent involvement is essential in creating a fluid home to school connection.

To learn more about the research Carol Weiss presented at the meeting, please visit the Talaris Institute's website. It is full of fascinating articles about children's emotional, academic, and social development.

On Friday, Carol Weiss highlighted four common parenting styles. They are the dismissing style, the disapproving style, the laissez-faire style, and the emotion coaching style. Here they are in more detail:

The Dismissing Style
"Just get over it!"
Dismissive parents deal with emotions by avoiding them. Rather than discussing emotions, dismissive parents may tell their children that there is no reason to feel the way they are feeling. Dismissive parents miss important opportunities to connect with their children, and their children are discouraged from sharing their feelings.

The Disapproving Style
"You shouldn't feel that way!"
Disapproving parents often do not acknowledge their own emotions, and discourage their children from acknowledging theirs as well. They may believe that emotions are a sign of weakness, or that they are not to be trusted. Children of disapproving parents have no model of how to express and talk about emotions in a healthy way.

The Laissez-Faire Style
"Anything goes!"
Laissez-Faire parents tell their children that all emotions are valid and therefore all behaviors are as well. While this is an improvement on the other styles, Laissez-Faire parents fail to teach their children how to manage their emotions. Children raised with this parenting style often do not know how to calm themselves down, have difficulty concentrating, and have difficulty with friends.

The Emotion Coaching Style
"Empathize and guide."
Emotion coaching parents give their children language for their emotions and help them find solutions to their problems. Like the laissez-faire style, emotion coaching values all feelings, but it differs in that it does not condone all behaviors. Children learn how to name their emotions and how to act on them.

The five steps of emotion coaching are:

1. Be aware of emotions.
Tune into your child's feelings and your own.

2. Connect with your child.
Use emotional moments as opportunities to connect.

3. Listen to your child.
Respect your child's feelings by taking time to listen carefully.

4. Name emotions.
Help your child name and identify emotions.


5. Find good solutions.
Explore solutions to problems together.


If you missed this meeting, please stop by the office to pick up a brochure on parenting styles and emotion coaching. Please let us know if you are interested in parent meetings and/or workshops with Carol Weiss in the future!